Two, Too Violent Girls: Ling-Ling & Lung-Lung

Two, Too Violent Girls: Ling-Ling & Lung-Lung (Abarenbō Musume Rinrin Ranran, 暴れん坊娘リンリンランラン) is the eighteenth episode in the third season of Ranma ½, Hard Battle, and is the 58th episode overall.

Relation to the Previous Episode
None, but the flashback of Shampoo's loss to Ranma and Ranma & Genma in cursed form eating the victory feast at Nyuchiehzu is from Enter Shampoo, the Gung-Ho Girl! I Put My Life in Your Hands.

The Twins Appear
At the Cat Café, Shampoo tells her great-grandmother she's heading off for a delivery. As she rides along, though, she catches sight of two shadowy figures trailing her by leaping along the rooftops; she sends her bike leaping up into the air, but they also spring skyward and descend out of the sun, slicing Shampoo's bike into pieces and forcing her to leap off of it. She blocks a trident thrust with her delivery box, then catches a shortstaff in her free hand, nonchalantly but firmly saying that this is Japan, not China; it's improper to greet each other that way here.

Releasing the weapons and standing up, she addresses a pair of young girls in the same style of Chinese outfit as she herself is wearing; the trident wielding Ling-Ling (with aquamarine hair and mint green eyes), and the retractile shortstaff wielding Lung-Lung (with magneta hair and purple eyes). They smile and happily hug her, an embrace she returns, while telling her that they missed her, and the three Joketsuzoku set off at a leisurely walk, Shampoo's delivery temporarily forgotten.

The twins proudly tell Shampoo that they have just learned the famous Chinese Amazon "Dance of the Great Fire Dragon" technique, which Shampoo notes that even she doesn't know, and that they are no longer afraid even though she isn't there to watch over them any more. Shampoo notes that she is glad to see them, but questions why they came to Japan, whereupon they explain they've been wondering how Shampoo has fared in her quest to defeat Ranma, the foreign woman who humiliated her back in the village.

They were confident in Shampoo's ability to win, but as their new technique and dedicated training has made them better than anyone else in the village, they decided to kill two birds with one stone. By coming to Japan they can find out what the deal is with Ranma and how "she" died, as well as looking for strong opponents to fight. Shampoo dissuades them from hearing the story of how she killed Ranma by pointing out she still has a delivery to make, and once they are gone notes that she has to tell Ranma about this right away, or there's going to be real trouble, and sets off in hopes of finding him first.

Meanwhile...
Not too far away, in female form, Ranma makes herself look as cute as possible and tries to charm a takoyaki vendor into giving her an extra octopus puff, delighted when she succeeds. Akane, having seen this, darkly asks if that's all Ranma's pride is worth, to which Ranma levelly replies that if she's got to be stuck turning into a girl all the time anyway, she may as well milk it for all it's worth. Akane promptly snatches the takoyaki from Ranma and sarcastically suggests Ranma just stay a girl all the time then, to which Ranma tells her to get real. Having seen her, Shampoo comes up from behind and surprises them both by drenching Ranma in hot water and latching onto his arm, begging him not to become a girl again.

Akane sarcastically notes that if Ranma stays a boy all the time, he can be Shampoo's groom all the time, but that also means he'll have to start paying for things. Ranma warns her not to start with him, but is disrupted when Shampoo tugs on his arm and insists she isn't talking about the enagement. She warns him that if he turns into a girl, "they" will try to kill him, a confusing and alarming message that has Akane suggest Shampoo starts from the beginning.

At the Furinkan High Kendo Club, the twins have called out the kendoists, with Tatewaki Kuno marvelling at "two proud maidens bearing arms who would beard the lion in his own den". However, he declares he cannot stand the thought of harming such beauty, for all that he admires their spirit. When they snap at him to shut up and fight, though, he takes on a more serious measure, declaring that maybe they do need a lesson and grabbing a shinai. However, as they charge him, he suddenly stops and repeats that he cannot bring himself to harm such pretty girls.

This is a fatal error, as they slice his sword into worthless sticks and knock him unconscious in one swift pass, the arrogant warrior having only the time to speak a pithy poem before he faints. Not burdened by Kuno's arrogance, the rest of the kendo club promptly swarms the girls, but they beat the weaklings senseless and proceed to challenge the boxing, karate, sumo, hockey and rugby clubs. Akane's former stalkers prove utterly inept, and the twins disdainfully proclaim the men of Japan to be weaker than the men of China before they set off to find more opponents, hopefully stronger ones.

Back with Shampoo
Shampoo, meanwhile, has just finished explaining that the Amazon Village is still more or less in the dark about Ranma's true gender and that her "little sisters" have come to Japan. Grimly, she explains that her people highly prize their pride; if the twins discover Ranma's female form is still alive, they will take it upon themselves to try and kill her/him, to avenge the dishonor of Shampoo, themselves and the village as a whole.

Ranma expresses the opinion that he has no intention of fighting them; Chinese Amazons or not, they're still women, and while he may cheapen himself for free eats, he won't hit girls. But then, he brags, he can just turn into a girl himself and beat the stuffing out of them, chasing them right back to China with their tail between their legs. Insulted, Shampoo and Akane both harrangue Ranma for dismissing the twins on grounds of being "just women", leaving Ranma struggling to apologise - or at least calm them down.

Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung, meanwhile, have arrived at the Tendo Dojo, where, to Soun Tendo's amusement, they have challenged him. Their temper burns increasingly hot when he continues to laughingly dismiss them, but they get diverted when Genma arrives... in panda form, allowing them to recognize him from the day of the challenge. They promptly draw their weapons and threaten the two men into telling them where Ranma is, realising that if this panda is alive, then Ranma may well be too.

Heading back to the Tendo Dojo, Ranma declares that he's fine with Shampoo's plan for him to stay in male form and avoid them, due to them not knowing about his curse. After all, he comments, he doesn't really like turning into a girl anyway. Akane can't resist pointing out he doesn't seem to have a problem with using it to score free food, which upsets Ranma. Once he comes down off the fence, though, Shampoo wraps around his arm, enthusing that once the twins have gone home, the two of them can marry, and then Ranma will be safe thanks to the laws of her village. Ranma is distinctly unenthused, while Akane quips that for a tribe of "female jocks" the Chinese Amazons sure don't seem to miss much. Ranma, easily seeing a fight breaking out, quickly interjects that it's okay if he doesn't turn into a girl then...

Which is when Genma, in human form, suddenly pops out of nowhere, screaming that it's not okay. Outraged, he asks what the neighbors will think if they hear Ranma is running for his life from a couple of little girls. Ranma merely barks back that they never would have met the Joketsuzoku, or at least wouldn't have them after their hides, if Genma hadn't dragged them to Jusenkyo or even China in the first place. Genma has the hypocritic audacity to accuse Ranma of trying to hide from his problems by pushing them onto others and it's time for Ranma to own up to his own mistakes for once and be a man. With that, he drenches Ranma in cold water, to Ranma's fury.

The Madness Continues
Just then, the twins emerge from the dojo, leading Soun out at weapons point. Both Ranma and Akane realise what's going on when the twins declare they've heard the whole story from the two masters of Anything Goes Martial Arts, with Akane in particular livid at her father's lack of spine. Rather than admit they didn't have the nerve to explain to the twins about Ranma being a boy who turns into a girl, Soun and Genma claim that the twins want to learn the techniques of their style, with Genma deciding it would best for them to be Ranma's students, in order to "teach him proper discipline". They push the twins foreward and quickly step back to let them get on with it.

Teary-eyed, the two girls declare that by leaving Ranma alive, Shampoo has not only betrayed their village; she has betrayed them and everything they once had too. But if she is too weak to kill Ranma, then they'll kill her in Shampoo's place. With that, they attack Ranma, proving skilled enough to cut a slash in either side of her shirt without drawing blood, which causes Akane to run out in front of Ranma protectively.

Ranma tells her to get out of the way as this is no time for martyrs - those girls are out for blood. Akane isn't happy about being called a martyr. When the twins charge them both for their next attack, to everyone's surprise, Shampoo interposes herself, declaring she won't let the twins hurt Ranma. They snap at her to get out of their way and not interfere, when Shampoo does something neither Ranma nor Akane can believe: she gives each "little sister" in turn the Kiss of Death.

From a tree, Cologne sadly watches this happen; she came looking for Shampoo when she didn't arrive promptly from her delivery, knowing something had to be wrong. She can hardly believe the idea of a Chinese Amazon promising to track one of her own tribal sisters to the ends of the earth if she must in order to kill them, but remorsefully notes that this may be the only way to save Ranma's life. She comments in disbelief that nobody could have known that Shampoo's feelings for Ranma were so very strong.

Tearfully, Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung notes that this means they are no longer sisters, and they must fight and kill each other. Shampoo declares that she will be waiting for them at the place they have agreed to fight at. Akane and Ranma clumsily try to express sympathy for her, but she just leaves silently. As she follows Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung, Soun and Genma note that with women like that running around, the suffering of the male Joketsuzoku must truly be legendary, shortly before tearfully hugging each other and thanking the gods that they were born in Japan.

Heading inside, Akane encourages Ranma to go and help her, something that Ranma may or may not want to do herself; she points out to Akane that if she does go and save Shampoo, though, then Shampoo will take that as a sign of Ranma loving her. Akane admits that's true, but insists Ranma owes it to Shampoo - after all, she just gave the Kiss of Death to her sisters in all but blood to protect Ranma, which Ranma admits means something to her too. But she insists that those young girls can't really stand a chance against Shampoo... which is when Cologne's voice rings out, asking if she's so sure of that. Hopping down from the roof, she tells them that while Shampoo has been in Japan, the twins have been training even harder than Shampoo ever used to.

In fact, they have now mastered the terrible Dance of the Great Fire Dragon technique, a move said to have come down from the heavens to punish insolent mortals. If they use that move on Shampoo, she will be helpless... not that she expects Ranma to care, she rasps, before leaping away. That's all the excuse the two girls need to resolve to go and help Shampoo.

The Twins Turn on Shampoo
In a park or forest somewhere nearby, the twins and Shampoo battle fiercely, Shampoo complimenting the two on how much their skill has increased. Distraught and infuriated, the twins declare that they trained so hard because they had Shampoo as an example, but now she has not only failed to kill Ranma, but has actually given up on trying. This, they declare, is the worst of all humiliations for a Chinese Amazon warrior - worse than letting a neighbor steal your field, or cutting firewood with your weapon, or allowing your favorite pet cow to be eaten by a bear.

Shampoo tries to rebutt this, but the twins are adamant; they will defeat Shampoo and then retrain her all over again. One twin leaping onto the other's back, they spin around at high speed, both twins lashing out at Shampoo, who proves skilled enough to tackle even this threat. She knocks down a pair of trees, catching the girls in the falling branches and knocking them to the ground. Pulling themselves out from under the debris, they declare it to be time to use their most powerful move; the Dance of the Great Fire Dragon.

Ranma arrives in time to hear Shampoo's final scream, and picks up the pace, finding her sprawled on the ground, burnt and clinging to consciousness. Feebly, Shampoo begs Ranma to forget about her and escape while she can, but Ranma won't hear of it, challenging the twins more determined then before. With her opening volley, though, she bounces off of both their heads, kicking them facefirst into the dirt as she does, then wonders how such weaklings could have possibly beaten Shampoo. They proceed to show him by using Dance of the Great Fire Dragon.

When Akane arrives, though, she can hardly believe her eyes; the twins are hoisting aloft a badly made Chinese Dragon puppet, from which music can be heard playing, while Ranma is dancing around and around the clearing. Akane heads over to her and scolds her for goofing off at a time like this, whereupon Ranma irritably points out that this isn't something she's doing of her own free will; Akane realises she is dancing too, right before the twins reveal the dragon also contains a flamethrower, chasing the girls around and around the clearing while trying to barbeque the both of them.

Cologne, who followed Ranma and Akane, notes that the technique works through the magical music, said to have been handed down by the gods. Hearing this, Shampoo shouts out to Ranma to plug up her ears, which will block out the music and render her and Akane safe from the hypnosis. Ranma does just this and tries to take on the twins, but reduced to mere kicking attacks means that she fails to inflict any real damage. Ranma then hits upon a second plan; having Akane sit on her back and cover Ranma's ears for her, enabling Ranma to use her rapid-fire punching technique. This doesn't work so well, and both of them get fire-blasted before Ranma's insulting of Akane as mule-like and tonedeaf allows her to muster up enough fury to block out the hypnotic music and cover Ranma's ears successfully.

The Twins are Defeated
Now defended against the technique's spell, Ranma dodges an extra powerful gout of flames called the Fire Dragon Fireball and batters the machine so badly its fuel tank goes up and it explodes, hurling the casette player into a nearby tree where it breaks. Shampoo just manages to save the twins in the nick of time before they get seriously hurt.

Ashamed and embarrassed, Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung admit they now understand why Shampoo couldn't beat Ranma, and Shampoo gently tells them to leave Ranma to her and go back home to China. Ranma bluntly suggests Shampoo go home with them, which prompts her to make an angered comment that she won't go back - which prompts the twins to add that they can't go home either, not now that they are disgraced. Ranma, irritated, asks if they have learned nothing in all of this; Akane conveniently douses him with hot water, allowing him to conclude by revealing the truth, that he's actually a guy.

At this, the twins excitedly take an arm each, declaring that's good, because they have to marry a guy who can beat them, so now they both get to marry Ranma instead. Angrily Shampoo demands to know what the twins are thinking; Ranma belongs to her! The twins merely comment that good sisters always share with each other. Ranma isn't happy about this, especially when one of the twins adds that means Ranma will now have three Joketsuzok brides, and desperately asks Akane to help. Akane merely sticks her nose in the air in a huff and mockingly congratulates Ranma before stalking off. Shampoo wraps her arms around Ranma's neck and lovingly declares that she'll be his number one wife, which just makes Ranma all the more upset.

Watching all of this, Cologne chortles with glee about how only Ranma could have three Joketsuzoku warriors falling at his feet.

Later On
Later that afternoon, at the Tendo Dojo, Ranma and Akane talk about the events of the day. Ranma expresses his relief that the law for marriage via defeats is first-come, first-serve, while Akane notes that it hasn't changed the fact that Shampoo is still set on dragging Ranma to the alter. Ranma protests that doesn't count, as it's her idea and not his, while Akane melancholically asks if it counts if it's a parental engagement. Timidly, Ranma insists that it doesn't count, though he can't bring himself to explain why and both teens quickly break gazes when this causes them to lock stares. Akane notes that, despite everything, she's happy Shampoo made up with the twins, with Ranma noting that it's no surprise they were so violent, considering what Shampoo is like.

As they share a laugh over this, though, Shampoo's voice suddenly cries out in warning and she drops from the sky to land in front of them, facing the wall and in a fighting stance. Before their horrified eyes, the wall explodes as two more Joketsuzoku, a blue-haired teenage girl carrying a kanabo and a light green-haired teenage girl carrying a trident and shield, step through, demanding Ranma show herself and fight. Sheepishly, Shampoo tells Ranma to say hello to two more of her sisters, at which Ranma faints.

Trivia

 * This episode proves that, selfish and amoral as she is, no matter how bizarrely she may show it, Shampoo truly does love Ranma.
 * The dub specifies that Ling-Ling & Lung-Lung are not blood-relatives of Shampoo and "sister" is merely a sign of close friendship and tribal bonds.
 * As insulting as the way he phrases it is, Ranma's comments about turning into a girl to fight the twins is a lampshade on the fact that Ranma tends to only fight girls in the series when he himself has taken the form of a girl, and that this is perceived as more "moral" than fighting them as a boy is.
 * This episode implies it might be possible in some exceptional circumstances for the Chinese Amazons to allow polygynous marriages.
 * Once they find out Ranma is a boy, the twins seem to develop something of a crush on him; not only are they quite eager to suggest marrying him (and sharing him with Shampoo) when he first reveals his gender, but they sound eager and adopt starry eyes when the idea of him having fallen in love with them is brought up in the episode Ling-Ling & Lung-Lung Strike Back!
 * In the sub, the haiku Kuno speaks after being defeated by the twins goes "pointed green recollections; of knights' ancient dreams", while the dub attempts to convey the same feeling with the poem "love not too wisely, but too well".
 * When Shampoo berates Ranma for his sexist talk in the dub, she calls him a "sexy pig"... who can say if this is an accidental mixup, due to her poor grasp of the spoken language, or if this is a Freudian slip?
 * In the subtitles, when the twins berate Shampoo during their fight with her, they claim that Shampoo has broken the law by "falling in love with a man" and that the duty of the Chinese Amazons is supposedly to make men miserable. But in the rest of the episode they act as though they are unaware of Ranma's true gender, and their comments of treating men badly don't match up with the behavior displayed by Shampoo or Cologne in the series.
 * The music used for the Dance of the Great Fire Dragon consists of some traditional Chinese instruments being sounded before the instrumental of Don't Make Me Wild Like You, begins.