The Witch Who Loved Me: A Japanese Ghost Story

Majo ga Aishita Shitagi Dorobō (魔女が愛した下着ドロボー) is the 28th episode of Ranma ½ Nettohen.

When Happosai's panty raids become too much, Soun is elected as town chairman and charged with the nearly impossible: stop the panty-thief. Can Ranma possibly pull through and put an end to Happosai's antics?

Relation to the Previous Episode
None.

Plot Overview
One evening in Nerima, a distraught Soun Tendo slowly makes his way home; at the door, he gets knocked over by Happosai, who is cheerfully setting off on yet another pantyraid, and is then run down by Ranma, who was trying to catch him. Even as Ranma expresses his disgust with Happosai, Soun asks why Happosai must be such a pervert and starts weeping.

Later that night, as a confused Ranma, Genma, Akane and Kasumi gather around the table, Soun is still down in the dumps, and nobody knows why. Noting that today was the day of town representative meeting, Akane suggests that maybe Soun has been picked as the replacement chairman. Ranma asks why Soun would bother, to which Kasumi protests that Soun would be perfect for the job, and he certainly has nothing else to do. Soun finally speaks up and explains that he was indeed selected to be the new chairman, but the post came with a sting in the tail: they expect him to finally catch the panty thief who has been plaguing the neighborhood.

Soun notes with growing dread that he is damned on two sides; if the council discovers that he not only knows the panty thief, but has been harboring him under his own roof, his reputation will be ruined, but if Happosai discovers Soun's new authority, who knows what he will do to use Soun to his own ends? Ranma immediately suggests legalizing panty raids, authorizing all the free meals he can get, and establishing a "be nice to a freak week", much to Soun's horror and Akane's reprimand. Soun demands that neither Ranma nor Akane let Happosai know, something they willingly agree to... but when Nabiki arrives and immediately comments on Soun's new position, they realise something's up. To Soun's horror, Genma slipped out halfway through the conversation and has now erected an elaborate sign boasting of Soun's new appointment. And then, to make matters worse, Happosai arrives in time to see it.

Meeting with Soun and Genma in his room, Happosai notes that he can understand why Soun has been on edge around him; Soun is afraid of being linked to the underwear thief. Soun and Genma are delighted to see that Happosai truly does seem to understand their fears, with the grandmaster of Anything Goes noting that just because he likes to steal underwear he's not some sort of unfeeling monster. But it turns out that their hopes were unfounded; Happosai declares that he's going to go with them on their "nightly rounds" and, sure enough, turns it into a panty raid in which they are forced to help him.

With Happosai actually refusing to put out the lantern he is using, even though this will make it much easier for others to identify them, Soun starts tearfully writing up his resignation from the town council. Finally, after a long night of looting and plundering, Happosai calls it a night, "graciously" offering the underwear that Soun and Genma have been carrying for him as their share of the spoils. When he declares that they are going to do this again the next night, Soun faints.

The next day, Ranma is summoned to Soun's room, where Soun begs him for help, as he is the only one who can possibly save the Tendo Dojo from Happosai's self-absorbed criminality.

That night, Happosai stirs in his room, noting that for some reason, the pilfering is starting to lose its glamor; it's just not as satisfying as it used to be. Idly musing to himself that maybe he should start passing over the smaller sizes, or going for silk instead of cotton, he heads out to the streets and finds Ranma waiting for him outside the gate into the Tendo grounds.

The unlikely duo set off down the street, Happosai growing increasingly annoyed with Ranma's following of him. He snaps at Ranma to buzz off and leave him alone, then spots a choice-looking bra and goes leaping up to claim it. Ranma promptly intercepts him and kicks him back down to the street. What follows is a long chase through the streets of Nerima, Ranma constantly attacking Happosai as he tries to steal something, and it ends when the two return to the Tendo Dojo, Ranma falling into the koi pond and being assaulted by the perverted Happosai.

In his room, Soun tearfully awaits the arrival of the former chairman, and, understandably, sobs that he is ruined when Kasumi confirms that he has arrived. Though he manages to keep the man from seeing Ranma and Happosai running around the living room, the former chairman does bring up the fact that the panty thievery has only gotten worse, not better.

Luckily for Soun, that's not what brought him here; instead, he wants Soun to guard a local treasure in the former chairman's antique shop, as he will be going out of town on a business trip for a few days. The item in question is an antique brassiere that belonged to an empress. Happosai eavesdrops on this, excited; this would make an excellent addition to his hoard. But Ranma escapes her momentary subdual and Happosai is forced to send her hurtling through the roof again. While he is distracted, Soun gets the former chairman to whisper the remaining secrets of the bra to him, so nobody can interrupt them or otherwise spoil things.

The next evening, a team of Soun, Genma, Ranma and a reluctant Akane gets ready to go and stand watch over the shop. Happosai, bold as brass, has the audacity to ask if he can tag along, but Soun firmly and politely tells him no - even when Happosai starts wailing about how it's not fair and shedding tears, he insists that they can't let Happosai near a bra, much less this particular one.

On the way there, Akane comments about how she is so proud of her father for actually standing up to Happosai, and he justifiably basks in the praise before noting it won't really do any good; Happosai will come, he can't help himself, but Soun's words may have bought them a little time. Indeed, when they arrive at the store, Happosai is just behind them, watching from the shadows and gloating that their efforts will be for naught.

Making their way inside, commenting on actually being called on to guard a genuine "cursed antique shop", they approach the small box in which the ancient bra is sealed. Genma, curious, tries to get a look at it, with Soun barring his efforts. Ranma ends up splashing Genma and telling him to stop acting like the old freak, something that Genma finds quite insulting, when they hear a window breaking and go running to investigate - but it turns out to be a diversion; racing back, they find Happosai has already beaten up Soun and he quickly makes off with the antique box.

The quartert chases after him, Soun shouting at Happosai that he mustn't open the box no matter what. Akane asks just what the deal is, as Soun hasn't shared the secrets of the former chairman with any of them, but he just ignores her and drives them on.

They finally corner Happosai in a park, where, to everyone's surprise, Soun suddenly makes them back off and tells Happosai to go ahead and open it. Waving the teens over to him, they watch as Happosai does just that... whereupon the bra suddenly lifts up out of the box and fastens itself onto his head, covering his eyes. Soun then explains that the bra belonged to an evil, jealous woman named Yokihi, who would kill any man who dared to look upon a woman other than her, and that the bra is cursed so that any man who lays eyes upon it will never again be able to look at women. Soun falls to his hands and knees, begging Happosai for forgiveness, as he had no choice.

Happosai just tells Soun to stop grovelling; he personally doesn't think this is so bad, as it's a really cute little bra. As he eagerly rubs and licks it, the bra starts to glow and vapor rises from it, forming into the shape of a coldly regal woman in an antique kimono, demanding to know who has awoken her from her slumber. This, Soun declares in shock, can't be anyone else but the ghost of Yohkihi.

Upon catching sight of Happosai, she is disgusted and promptly cancels the curse. Happosai actually protests its removal, but those cease when he catches sight of Yohkihi. Immediately Happosai goes leaping for her, but she swats him from the air in disgust, noting in a repulsed tone that while it may have been a while, it hasn't been that long. Upon catching sight of Ranma, she perks up, hungrily noting that he is much more her type. Cooing at him to "come to momma, little boy", she glows, hypnotizing Ranma and bringing him striding mechanically towards her.

Akane tries to grab Ranma, but Yohkihi swats her away in irritation, and when Soun and Genma interpose themselves, Soun offering himself up in Ranma's place, she ensnares them with a ribbon and sends them hurtling into the sky, angrily proclaiming that she has no interest in either old men or pandas. Lustfully purring at Ranma to "come here sexy", she leans in to kiss him, only for Happosai to stamp down on his head, pegs pulling his wrinkly old face into something smoother. The old pervert asks how Yohkihi likes his instant face-lift, then offers her a bouquet and asks how she'd feel about getting hitched, whereupon she slaps him away even more forcefully than before while screaming that she isn't that desperate. She tries to resume her kiss of Ranma, only for Akane to splash him with cold water and taunt her about kissing "her".

The spirit notes in shock and rage that Ranma is now a woman, and Ranma, mind free, leaps back, taunting her that her mind-tricks only work on men. This is the last straw for the evil spirit; she transforms into a monstrous serpent-woman and attacks, ensnaring both Ranma and Akane in the giant snake's tail that is her lower body and gloating she's going to squeeze the life out of them. The pressure she exerts is formidable, and Akane's weak gasps of being unable to breathe just convince Ranma to call out to Genma to hurry back with the kettle of hot water, protesting that she has no choice when Akane raises that Yohkihi will hypnotize him again if he changes back.

Then Happosai returns, latching firmly onto Yohkihi's breasts; she promptly punches him off and straight into Genma, causing him to spill the hot water all over himself. When she sees Genma's human form, she mistakes him for her "love" (in the subbing, Emperor Xuan Zong), returning to her humanoid form and happily running after him even as he flees, protesting that he's not who she thinks he is and just a middle-aged nobody. Ranma expresses disgust at Yohkihi's taste in men, shuddering when Akane mentions that she just might be one of Ranma's ancestors - even Soun founds this turn of events hard to believe, while Happosai is furious that Genma would "flirt with his master's woman".

Genma manages to ward Yohkihi by diving into a pond and turning into a panda again, whereupon Happosai latches onto her back, holding tight as she runs around and around, trying desperately to shake him off, then finally simply fading into nothingness, leaving behind only her bra. Happosai's sorrow at this gives way to full-on heartbreak when the bra itself disintegrates into nothingness. Tears in his eyes, he declares he has to go away and clear his head, warning them not to stop him. Of course, nobody is in the slightest inclined.

The next day or so at the Tendo Dojo is a day of celebrations, but Ranma is cynical of how long it will take for Happosai to recover his perverted attitudes and return, a sentiment that Akane is quick to echo. Sure enough, Happosai promptly comes bounding in, lingerie on his back and cackling like his usual obnoxious self. Soun, in a borderline faint, dictates the notes of his resignation as chairman, then starts crying like a broken fountain in despair.

Quotes
To be added

Trivia

 * This is the first episode to imply that Soun Tendo doesn't actually teach any students, something that will become explicitly stated in Kodachi the Black Rose! The Beeline to True Love.
 * According to the subbed version, the haunted bra is the Phantom Bra of Yang Gui-fei.
 * Similarly, the sub claims that Emperor Xuan Zong risked his entire empire to win the hand of Yang Gui-fei.
 * This is technically the first episode to have absolutely no connection to the manga whatsoever. While Kuno's House of Gadgets! Guests Check In, But They Don't Check Out is the first episode to be constructed of entirely anime-exclusive events, it is still an expansion of the story begun in Assault on the Girls' Locker Room, which did take place in the manga while also including story elements that the manga covered in the storyline animated originally as Clash of the Delivery Girls! The Martial Arts Takeout Race. The Witch Who Loves Me is a complete story exclusive to the anime version of Ranma ½.
 * In the dub, when Soun describes the Antique Shop contains alot of cursed Antiques and Ranma comments "Just like that TV show.". Ranma is referring to the 80's horror series "Friday the 13th: The Series" ("Friday's Curse" in other countries) where despite the name Jason Voorhees doesn't appear in it, the series is indeed about cursed antiques and it's protagonists trying to get them back before their cursed effects kill anyone.